Coffee, Talk, & a Walk: Dr. Ashley Solomon

I’m excited that Dr. Ashley Solomon is sharing her thoughts with us today about perseverance. I really admire her career and accomplishments.  Thank you, Ashley, for taking part!

Ashley Solomon, Psy.D, is a psychologist who specializes in the treatment of eating disorders, body image, trauma, and serious mental illness. She loves ice cream, yoga, and sleep. You can connect with her on her website ( or on Facebook and Twitter.   I recommend that you do. Read Ashley’s Interview below!

Image (c) Dr. Ashley Solomon
(c) Dr. Ashley Solomon

What is the best piece of advice you have ever received? Who did you receive it from?

Growing up, my self-esteem was rocky and I would often find myself afraid of facing the world. I was so scared of being judged by others, so I would go ahead and pre-judge myself. I’d tell myself that there’s no way I’d ever be good enough, or smart enough, or pretty enough for everyone else. My mom used to quote Eleanor Roosevelt when she would say to me, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” At some point along the way, I stopped taking that as my mom blabbering and realized how much truth there was in those words. I had to allow people to treat me poorly. I realized that no one could really make me feel anything. It was up to me to decide how I wanted to approach the world – expecting to be torn down or feeling strong and empowered. Eventually, I chose the latter, and it’s made a huge difference in the way others see me and the way I see myself.

How important is mentorship in terms of your success?

Mentorship has truly been key. Without strong support and guides, I could never have achieved so many of my goals. I’ve been lucky to have a number of mentors in my life, often for short but crucial periods. In my field, you always have a direct supervisor who actually functions more like a mentor (if they’re good!). I’ve had amazing individuals who have been able to not only help me develop my skills in psychology, but to become a fuller and more grounded person.

What has been the best moment in your life so far?

Oh, wow, that’s tough. I really try hard to practice mindfulness and to be present with each moment of my life. So I think there have been so many incredible moments I’ve experienced. But one really memorable moment, to be cliche here, was the night that I married my husband. After the ceremony and once we had gotten to the reception (and the stress was off!), I remember sharing our first dance and feeling like the world totally melted away. I think it was one of the first moments that day that I felt what the day was really about, and I was so happy to be with my best friend, knowing this was the beginning of forever. How cheesy is that, right?

What tips would you have for living a healthy life?

Eat what you love, and love what you eat. Learn to listen to the signals of your body – when it’s full, when it’s tired, when it needs closeness, when it needs medical attention. Trust your gut instincts – about things that don’t feel right in your body or your soul. Our intuition is so powerful. Take time to rest – it’s just as important as activity. Try to move your body in ways that make you feel good, not anxious or unhappy. Floss your teeth. Eat colorful foods. Cultivate your relationships. Try to learn something new every day. Practice gratitude. Do all that, and I think you’ll be healthy.


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My Random Thoughts on Perseverance

I came up with the idea to interview individuals while walking by the water this past Easter weekend.  Instead of only asking people to share their stories, I’m also asking them the following questions that have been featured on my blog.  To kick off the series, I decided to share my personal answers to the questions.

What is the best piece of advice you have ever received? Who did you receive it from?

Don’t be afraid to ask questions.” I learned this lesson from a high school math teacher. During the first term, I was having a hard time grasping the concepts in Algebra and Geometry class. Instead of reaching out and asking my teacher for help, I decided to try to understand the class material myself. I was shy and had a hard time going up to people and asking for help. I thought asking for her help would show that I did not understand the material, and that she would think I was inadequate. However, I was not happy with my level of understanding and wanted to improve. So, I got up the courage, and asked my teacher for help on a question that I was stuck on. She was proud of me for gaining the strength to ask for help. I felt so great from this positive experience, that I kept coming back to see her throughout the semester. Guess what – my marks improved significantly, and I mastered that course.  Almost ten years later, her lesson is still with me!


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